As if it wasn't bad enough that I was up at 7 a.m., I was dragged to church. Me, personally, I find there is nothing for me in religion. But I went and I smiled for Oma's sake. She's got a lot to deal with currently so I figure it. I go to church for her and I learn to play that peice of crap, called a guitar for opa. Well I also have to learn the guitar because Opa said he'd get me a car if I tried. So yeah. It wasn't all that bad this week. It was all patriotic and I just zoned out and listened to this ex-marine go on and on. I got a lot accomplished though. I figured out what I would be wearing to Elena's birthday party today. [The skirt with the red roses and the black polo] What I was wanting for lunch.[Burger King] How many people had visible panty lines.[6...improvements...though I saw a lot of camel toes] How many men were balding.[15]. It's a small church and most people were probably on vaction too. Lucky them. I would be going to fucking Europe next week but things are continuing to make life hell. Not just for me, I'm not the one with the cancer but I mean still. IT WAS EUROPE!!!! FOR 2 WEEKS!!! ON A CRUISE!!!. I was looking forward to it ALL YEAR!! There's always when I retire. If I get to. Anyways so after the service I went home and watching some of Steel Magnolias and went on a small bike ride. Then got dressed and we went up to the pool for Elena's party. Wow nothing is more fun than watching a bunch of 7 year old's play in a pool and you can't go into that pool and cool off because of a stupid monthly cycle.
But I guess connie was right. "It's better than hot flashes and Cold sweats...Enjoy it while you can". They gave us a choice of Hot Dogs or Peanut Butter and Jelly. I took the sandwich...Someone asked me why I didn't want a hot dog. I told them I was a vegitarian. No, actually I said I can't stand the taste or sight of Hot Dogs. I regrettably trusted my uncle in telling him that I didn't like the guitar and didn't believe in god. Two known things to anyone who paid attention. He was all "You told the wrong person....So you're lying to them....honesty is best" and other BS like that. So lesson for today. Don't tell him anything like that anymore. which sucks too. I thought I could trust him enough to A) not mention it to Oma or Opa and B) NOT BRING IT UP AGAIN!! I didn't really think it was that much to ask. But I could be wrong. Fuck. I just remembered that friday is Amanda's graduation party. I really wanted to go too. But now I can't. I'm going to be here. Going to a mine most likely. So now I won't get to see Ashli, Lea, Britney, or Amanda. Maybe I can get Lauren to give me the number so I can call her. ugh! Is there anything I get to do this summer that is remotely fun??? Europe was cancelled. I can't go to ANY of the parties I planned on going to. And the whole going to Florida thing in place of Europe thing is down the drain because my mother can't trust my father to be home alone and not find some other women to fuck. ARGH! Are you kidding me? This year is turning out to really suck. Opa dies. I don't get to go to the funeral so I am still a mess from the death. Then 3 of my uncles and my aunt completely cut off all ties with us because they are only partly related to my dad and that relation died. I am stuck for the summer in the same place I was last year. I don't get to see what little amount of friends I do in fact have. My family is so messed up and filled with drama. We deserve an MTV reality show. I find out recently my oma is dating again. ITS NOT EVEN BEEN 6 Monthes yet!! Now this Opa may have lung cancer. Dear Mary, is it going to get any better? The doctors have yet to even do a biopsy on opa so there is a chance that all the shadows on the X ray and the other tests were wrong. Highly unlikely but you know one can only hope. I can't wait til college..I can go to Flagler and get away from everything. I think I have gone on enough. My posts seem to just be sooo long...So THE END
